I Couldn't Save You

You broke my rose colored glasses today.
        made me peek beneath the surface of humanity
                       see the raw underbelly, the cruelty brewing beneath the surface.
        placed your soul on the dissecting table
        gave me the scalpel.
        told me to cut out the bruises.

The look you gave me
was so tragic
pain rippled
through your dilated irises.

I bit my lip,
   inhaled deeply
  shut one eye
  cut out the impurities
  ignored your cries
  knew you felt pain
  continued anyway.

I only did what you asked.
took out the bruises
the problems.

But I couldn't make you whole.

You filled the holes
        smoked
        drank
        shot up
        died.

        Forgave me.